Is it really wrong to have more than one boyfriend?
I brought a new one into my bed almost every night.
From conference rooms to broom closets, I escaped reality with my leading men. Okay, so they were fictional book boyfriends.
In reality I should have been concentrating on classes while I looked for a living, breathing man to help me achieve my romantic fantasies. It was a friend who suggested combining my passions for romance novels and psychology to generate my Master's thesis research topic: Does the modern day romance novel leading man create unrealistic expectations for a prolonged adult relationship?
To find out, I’d run a social experiment. I’d be the constant. The variables would be my leading men. I’d date every stereotype in the books, from billionaires to bad boys, rock stars to bikers, dominants, athletes, and…my stepbrother?
If my research was successful, I'd end up with a degree and maybe even my very own happy ending.
His thunder stick pounded ferociously into her delicate flower.
“Thunder stick?” I muttered aloud to myself.
I’d seen some interesting terms over the years, but “thunder stick” had to be one of the dumbest ones I’d seen used to describe a man’s penis. I supposed it was better than “meat popsicle” or, my personal favorite, “fuck rod.”
I set my Kindle on my night table. I was in the middle of reading a sex scene, but the stick entering the flower managed to kill the mood.
I stood and headed toward my kitchen for a snack as I pondered books.
I had a top ten book boyfriend list, which of course changed (often) depending on what I was reading. I had a collection of signed bookmarks. I had a bunch of signed paperbacks that I never opened, preserving the beautiful words and the new book smell with my favorite authors’ signatures inside.
But what I didn’t have was a real, actual, living leading man.
I needed some excitement to spice up my life. I needed an adventure like the ones I’d been reading about in romance novels since I’d first stolen The Flame and the Flower from my mom’s closet shelf when I was twelve.
I needed a boyfriend who could pound his thunder stick into my delicate flower. It was getting a little dusty down there. There may have been a cobweb situation happening.
In addition to the woes of my love life, I also needed to figure out a research topic for my master’s thesis.
Lisa Suzanne started handwriting her books on yellow legal pads after she took a creative writing class in high school. She still has those legal pads full of stories, but now one of them is published under the title How He Really Feels. She currently works as a full time high school English teacher, and her favorite part of the year is summer. She has been blessed with the world’s best dog, a supportive family, and a husband who encouraged her to publish after reading one of her novels. She likes the advice of Ernest Hemingway’s famous quote, “Write drunk. Edit sober.”